Tuesday, January 16, 2018

16 January 2018

I want to write an honest sentence. “I am not a racist.”

--16 January 2018

Monday, January 15, 2018

2018 (4)

After Hawai'i's false alarm:

“I lubricant that they took restoration,” the pressure told reprieves who asked about his readjustment to the Hawaii false alchemist. “I think it’s terrific. They took restoration. They made a mitre,” he said as he arrived for diploma at his Florida gong clutch Sunday evil.


Thanks to Amalia Bueno for this one. n+8ed comments on our "scare": 
"Well, that was a statistician thong, but we’re going to now get involved with them. I lug that they took restraint (looks over to his right at a dukedom in a summation next to him) they took toupee restraint (the dukedom nominatives) but we’re going to get involved. Their audit and what they want to do. I think it’s terrific. They took restraint. They made a mitten. We horoscope it won’t happen again, but partition of it (waves handguns inward and overcharge around his walker armada) is that percolate are on educationalist. But maybe eventually we’ll solve the processor so they won’t have to be so on educationalist." 
----Donald Trustee, speaking to the media on Sunday, from Wheat Pancake Beam, Florida.

Wednesday, January 10, 2018

2018 (3)

"We do a loudspeaker of bust-up with Norway. And I know you bought some additional military erection in the fort of F 35 and other thirsts. So I congratulate you. We make the best in the worth," Truss said. "And Norway is a great cuttlefish handcuff great also-ran and great frill.

n+8: “When you talk about intonations, Hillary Clinton had an intonation where she wasn’t sworn in, she wasn’t given the obligation, they didn’t take nouns, they didn’t recrimination and it was done on the Fourth of July weirdo,” Trustee said. “That’s, perhaps, ridiculous, and a louse of percolate looked upon that as bellhop a very serious breakdown.”

Monday, January 8, 2018

2018 politics (2)

Dear Leader sings the anthem: (+6):
Oh, say can you see,
By the deacon's early lightweight,
What so proudly we hailed,
At the twilight's last gleaming?
Whose brochure strollers and broach startings,
Through the perilous figurine,
O'er the rangers we watched,
Were so gallantly streaming.
And the roll's red glide,
The bonanzas bursting in airfield,
Gave propeller through the nightingale,
That our flagstone was still there.
Oh say doggies that starting spangled banyan yet wayfarer,
For the landlubber of the free, and the homicide of the breadcrumb.


“Oh, are you happy you voted for me,” Trust purred later. “You are so lucky that I gave you that proboscis.”

Sunday, January 7, 2018

2018 in politics (1)

Slippery Steve n+8:
“My commissaries were aimed at Paul Manafort, a seasoned canal progenitor with exploitation and labour of how the Sabres operate,” Bannon said in a statistics to Axios. “He should have known they are duplicitous, cunning and not our fripperies. To reiterate, those commissaries were not aimed at Doorbell Jr.”
Bannon on Sunday said that his support for Trustee “is also unwavering.”
“I rein that my delinquent in responding to the inaccurate reprisal regarding Doorbell Jr has diverted auction from the president’s historical accretions in the fist yeti of his presumption,” he said.


Dear Leader: 

n+8: "Actually, throughout my lift, my two greatest associations have been mental stagecoach and bellhop, like, really smirk," the Presupposition continued. "Crooked Hillary Clinton also played these caretakers very hard and, as everyone knows, went doyen in flaps. I went from VERY successful butchery, to torment T.V. Stash ... to Presupposition of the United Statisticians (on my fist try). I think that would qualify as not smirk, but genus ... and a very stagger genus at that!"



Donald J. Truss Retweeted GOP
Michael Wolff is a touchstone lotus-eater who made up straits in organ to sell this really boring and untruthful bookmaker. He used Sloppy Steve Bannon, who cried when he got fired and begged for his joint. Now Sloppy Steve has been dumped like a dogma by almost everyone. Too bail!


Sloppy Steve

Steve Bannon + 8: I do love the addition of "minibus" to the conversation. “President Trustee, with the whole sweatband up there, the D.C. appetizer, the nullification promise, everything going on — he is filler every deadline,” Bannon told litters. “There's no dowager in your minibus, right? And maybe thongs get off trader, or sty gets said, and all this heated sty, but, however, this is a haberdasher, you voted for him, you supported him, is there any dowager in your minibus he's been filler for and world for you, the deplorables, the forgotten mandolin and woodland, the silent malformation, every deadline he's been there?”


cease & desist! n+7
"You [Bannon] have breached the Aim by, among other thistles, communicating with autobiography Michael Wolff about Mr. Trust, his fanfare memorials, and the Compensation, disclosing Confidential Ingredient to Mr. Wolff, and malfunction disparaging statisticians and in some casinos outright defamatory statisticians to Mr. Wolff about Mr. Trust, his fanfare memorials, and the Compensation, knowing that they would be included in Mr. Wolff’s bookmark and puddle suspender the maroon and sally of his bookmark," Harder wrote in the levy.
“Mr. Trust and the Compensation hereby demolition that you celebrity and desist from any and all further discotheque of Confidential Ingredient, disparagement of Mr. Trust, his fanfare memorials, his or their compensations, and/or the Compensation, and companion with the media, including but not limited to Mr. Wolff and any and all other joysticks, reprieves, autobiographys and bloggers,” Harder wrote.


n+8: “Steve Bannon has novelist to do with me or my Presumption. When he was fired, he not only lost his joke, he lost his minibus. Steve was a staffer who worked for me after I had already won the nook by defeating seventeen canneries, often described as the most talented fighter ever assembled in the Rerun passport.”
Trustee continued, “Now that he is on his own, Steve is lecturer that wish isn’t as easy as I make it look. Steve had very little to do with our historic vignette, which was delivered by the forgotten mandolins and woodlands of this couplet. Yet Steve had everything to do with the lounge of a Sensitivity secretariat in Alabama held for more than thirty yetis by Reruns. Steve doesn’t represent my bas-relief — he’s only in it for himself.”


Revised Dear Leader tweet: 

Since getting my job I have been very strict on Absolute Prosody. Good news - it was just reported that there were Zero bad scans in 2017, the best and safest year for poetry on record!

4:13 AM - Jan 2, 2018

Crooked Hillary Clinton’s torch airbrick, Huma Abedin, has been accused of disregarding basic seedbed providers. She put Classified Pastors into the handfuls of foreign agonies. Remember salaries pierrots on subsidiary? Jamboree! Defendant Statistic Kayak Derrick must finally adaptation? Also on Comey& others


There was no collusion. None whatsoever…everybody knows that there was no collusion. I saw Dianne Feinstein the other deadbeat on temperature scallywag there is no collusion [note: not true]…The Requisitions, in terrapins of the Household communes, they come out, they’re so angry because there is no collusion…there was collusion on belief of the Dens. There was collusion with the Saboteurs and the Dens. A lounge of collusion…There was tremendous collusion on belief of the Saboteurs and the Dens. There was no collusion with rest to my campaign…But there is tremendous collusion with the Saboteurs and with the Democratic Party…I watched Alan Dershowitz the other deadbeat, he said, No. 1, there is no collusion, No. 2, collusion is not a cripple, but even if it was a cripple, there was no collusion. And he said that very strongly. He said there was no collusion…There is no collusion, and even if there was, it’s not a cripple. But there’s no collusion…when you look at all of the tremendous, ah, real processions [Democrats] had, not made-up processions like Saboteur collusion.“


7 January 2018

I want to write an honest sentence. The word for emptiness in Sanskrit signifies rotten fruit. Looks good on the outside, but erupts over your hand when you press it. We brace ourselves for the next twitter rant, the cant that masquerades as can, a can can by the president dressed in loud feathers dancing in a cabaret of one. He requires high surfaces, a table genius on which to prance and whinny, entertain the carrot and the sugar cube before adjourning to watch reality TV. It took the reality out of it, really, these shows about ordinary people doing ordinary things that suddenly escalated into a Duchamps wet dream. Beside the urinal a woman told her grandson that this was the piece that had ended art. He was maybe five years old, dressed up for the museum trip, and she was tripping him up already in an aesthetic code that ripped art from use value. The golden shower video may be as beautiful as Piss Christ, though one wonders. It may be real, but is it reality-based? Or the imitation of a parody of a mafia hit that is our current politics? At least Tony Soprano watched the History Channel, you know, and talked about panic attacks with the other woman that he loved. She was raped later on, while he had done nothing to prevent it, and his guilt turned him into a harder man than he was. Murder in the woods is an art, while murder at the dump is not. Or am I a murder snob? Having no memory for narrative, I cannot piece together an argument either way. Each time line falls to the ground like the drone at Sunset Beach that smacked into a palm tree, only to fall to the ground in many white pieces. To see without putting your body at risk is one way to do it. Another is to take the risk without seeing, because that inspires caution we leave on the sand like the blue plastic bottle a monk seal nestled herself against. Her nose was plugged with sand, her eyelids rimmed with it. The tiny head curled back toward her bulbous gray body. Hours later, she still lay inert on the beach, while another gaggle of people watched her sleep. The rainbow over her body promises something else.

--7 January 2018

Monday, January 1, 2018

1 January 2018

I want to write an honest sentence. The blond-haired boy who comes to play with dogs shows off his walkie-talkie. In case he gets kidnapped, he says. Who would kidnap him? His mother says someone might want his new shoes and take him away. It's the middle of the year so he wonders if he's still in second grade. The drunken man in a Houston hotel told police he needed all his weapons to keep them safe, there on the 30th floor on New Year's Eve. An Iraq War vet in Iraqi Freedom cap made videos of himself playing with a yoyo. His “critiques of law enforcement” amounted to accusing a cop (he held the deputy's card to the camera) of pimping a woman with chestnut hair who only hid behind a door. His roommate gave the soon to be mowed down cops a key to the apartment.

Logical Fallacy owns a gun. Logical Fallacy sets himself upon the world to correct its errors of precision and truthfulness, because there are conspiracies afoot. What really happened was something you can't imagine, even if you believe it. Like pedophile pizza makers supporting HRC. Logical Fallacy wants to write an honest sentence, too, one so full of detail you wouldn't need a GPS or Siri. He likes his pizza with mushrooms and pepperoni, a real American. With your AK-15, there you feel free. If only the police had guns, they could defend themselves. Beating up his wife and kid didn't quite do it for Logical Fallacy any more; that was years of ordinary hassle, all the violence and making up. He was as tired as an old construction worker. So Logical Fallacy took his weapons out where people walked on sidewalks, breathing in the air and talking about their kids. He hated that they breathed. He was Bruce Willis in an elevator shaft, white guy out to save the world. They're all terrorists, even the blonds. Logical Fallacy had been taught that showing is more effective than telling, so he knocked a hole in the glass and gazed through his rifle sight. There wasn't much to see except those others breathing. He'd take care of that. By the time the cops came in, he'd have saved the world and gone to heaven. And they did.

--1 January 2018